Trusting in the Lord

This morning I was tagged in one of those Facebook posts for a 7 day scripture challenge.  For the  next seven days, I have been asked to post a favorite verse and tag two new people.  Several years ago, during a very tough time in my life, I had a mantra.  Isaiah12:2:  I will trust and not be afraid.  The Lord, the Lord, is my strength and my defense; He has become my salvation. When times got scary, I would repeat that verse over and over again because I couldn't even articulate prayers.  And that brought to mind how often the Lord took care of me when I saw no light at the end of my tunnel.

We found a lump in my breast.  Trust in the Lord.  It was only a cyst.

I was informed that I had Chiari Malformation.  Trust in the Lord.  It is very minor and currently causes no problems.

My husband got laid off.  Trust in the Lord.  The company I was working for at the time hired him and he is still employed there.  They have always been great for him regarding my illness, very understanding when he has to leave at a  moment's notice to take me to the hospital.

Needed new tires but couldn't afford them.  Trust in the Lord.  A friend had four new tires put on our van.

Money was tight and food was scarce.  Trust in the Lord.  An anonymous card arrived with a $300 grocery gift card.

I was hospitalized four times with no answers.  Trust in the Lord.  My rheumatologist figured out the problem and gave us hope for a solution.

Our stove and dryer both died in the same week.  Trust in the Lord.  A friend bought us a stove and another friend gave us a dryer.

Early on in my illness, I wasn't able to do simple every day things.  Trust in the Lord.  Friends and coworkers provided meals for over a month straight.  

I started chemo treatments and needed rides back and forth. Trust in the Lord.  Friends have provided rides back and forth for all of my rounds of chemo.

Sjogren's Syndrome has ruined my teeth and made me very uncomfortable out in public and with strangers.  Trust in the Lord.  A friend has offered to do all of my dental work for FREE!  Praise God!

My medical debt grew to scary and seemingly insurmountable levels.  Trust in the Lord.  A friend has started an online fundraiser to help with the debt.  

My newest challenge is leaving my family for three weeks to go to Germany for my dental work.  I am stressed and scared about the thought.  My family, especially  my husband, has always been my port in a storm.  I am leaving my husband to do both his job and mine during a season of particular busyness with concerts, orthodontics appointments and a crazy robotics schedule.  

I know what I need to do to get through all the fright and stress.  Trust in the Lord  

 

 

The Impact of Sjogren's Syndrome on Life

When I find myself in a situation with someone who does not know me or my story, I often feel like I need to defend myself.  I get questions like "Why don't you work?" or "What happened to your teeth?" (that one often comes from children or people who have zero tact).  There are very few people who have heard of Sjogren's Syndrome or know what it does.  When I do run into someone who has heard of it, they often say "Oh, that's the disease that makes you dry right?" Ha!  Understatement of the year but at least they get the concept.  And so often, when I explain that Sjogren's is an autoimmune disease that attacks moisture producing glands, I get the reaction that implies it's no big deal.  Honestly, when I was first diagnosed with it, I figured it was no big deal.  I assumed I would take some meds, use some OTC products to help with the symptoms and voila!  All set!  And I am sure that there are Sjoggie's out there who experience that end of the spectrum.  But not I.  

For starters, my symptoms started when I was 15 when the typical age is usually in the late 30's and early 40's.  My parotid glands would swell, harden and become very painful.  I spent the next nearly ten years chasing one incorrect diagnosis after another.  In the meantime, I was getting exasperated lectures from my dentist for not caring for my teeth in the manner that I should be.  There were always more cavities, and then some tooth decay.  I was so frustrated because it wasn't like I didn't care for my teeth.  It got to the point where I dreaded going to the dentist.  Finally, when I was 24 and newly pregnant with Miss Annika, I received the answers I had been searching for.  From an Urgent Care doctor no less.  He suggested I get tested for Sjogren's Sydrome and that started the ball rolling.  

In the early years after my diagnosis (and after my pregnancy), I took Plaquenil and used OTC products to treat my symptoms.  There were time periods when I didn't need either the medication or the eye drops and then there were others where I would feel like the problem was getting worse.  

Fast forward to 2011.  I was hospitalized for meningitis in mid December.  The tests all came back negative but the doctor's treated it as if it were bacterial meningitis.  I was sent home on a PICC line with Rocephin for 14 days.  As soon as I was sent home, I was back in the hospital for a blood patch treatment due to a botched lumbar puncture.  And just a few days after that, I was back in again for 7 days while they tried to figure out a reoccurring high temperature.  That turned out to be due to an allergic reaction to the Rocephin so the PICC line was removed and I was sent home.  Just a few weeks later, I was hospitalized for meningitis again.  Again, all tests were negative but I was sent home on another PICC line of Vancomycin.  I happened to see my rheumatologist after that and he said that it was very rare but possible for my Sjogren's to be causing the meningitis.  After that, we tried several different medications to subdue the meningitis but nothing worked.  He finally ordered Rituxan for me.  I get full day infusions, two weeks apart, every six months.  And it seems to work....mostly.  Near the end of the six month period, before my next round, I end up in the hospital with meningitis again.  All told, I have had meningitis 12 times in the last three plus years.  That's a lot of meningitis.  

So, obviously the meningitis has a big impact on our lives.  I get miserably sick, and even after the hospitalization, it takes me a good week or two to recover.  The Rituxan, while wonderful at helping with the meningitis also makes me extremely tired and I spend a week or two recovering from that.  Then there are the "flares" commonly associated with Sjogren's.  For me, the flares mean extreme dryness.  Mouth sores, lips cracked, bleeding and scabbed, painful red dry patches of skin, and my eyelids also get swollen, bloody and scabbed as well.  The flares can also cause excessive fatigue.  I am just coming down off of a dryness flare but now I am so tired I can't think straight.  I spent all of yesterday either in bed or on the couch, sleeping or at least dozing.  I have to force myself to get up just to tackle the smallest of household chores.

All of those lovely side effects impact my family as well.  My kids had to grow up quick and learn how to take on more and more of the stuff around the house.  The meningitis often scares my family.  For instance, yesterday I was having a problem with my phone (I didn't realize it) where calls would come in but the phone actually wouldn't ring.  Jimmy tried to call me on his lunch hour and couldn't reach me.  He understandably thought it was a meningitis attack.  In the past I have lost consciousness during an attack and I often don't know who I am or where I am.  He flew home like a crazy man and bust in the front door with a terrified look on his face.

Another way that Sjogren's impacts our lives is financially.  I currently have over $30,000 in medical debt from this journey.  And each year, I accrue another $5,000 because our deductible has to be met before our insurance covers a thing.  That doesn't even count what I spend on all of my prescriptions a year.  The Rituxan alone costs $600 a year.  Those burdens impact the rest of our lives.  Our dryer died over six months ago and we haven't been able to afford to replace it.  Repairs to our van have been put off because of the responsibility of trying to pay down $30,000 in debt.  

Please understand that I would not change a thing about this journey even if it causes difficulties along the way.  For every burden, God has blessed us doubly.  Our friends and church family have been a wonderful support with prayer, meals, and love.  Each time we hit an obstacle, God uses someone to help us around it.  When money for food was scarce, someone anonymously sent a Meijer gift card.  When we needed new tires, a friend had four new ones put on our van.  When our stove died, a friend bought us a new one.  When our dryer died, another friend gave us one. Even the medical debt is being addressed by a fundraiser our friend created for us at YouCaring:   Fundraiser for Medical Debt

God uses these trials to draw us closer to Him as well.  When I finally regained consciousness after my first hospitalization, I realized that God saved my life and it was time to get serious about my dedication to Him.  I was baptized after that in order to publicly show my obedience to Him.  Is it always easy?  No.  Do I get depressed or frustrated?  Definitely.  But God has had His hand in this journey every step of the way, and I know He isn't going to quit on us now. 

Where has time gone?

It is long past time that I resurrect this blog.  It's been almost a year since my last post and oh so many things have happened since then.  Our two middle kids started high school (ack!), I have hit my last year before the 40's, the Sjogren's is still going strong but God is always proving Himself stronger, and many blessings have come our way.  

Let me start with the blessings.  Recently our pastor asked us to send him an email about our "dry ground" experiences (Joshua 3 & 4-God parted the Jordan for the Israelites and as further evidence of His miracles, the ground under the Jordan was dry) and so I composed a short email of what I was grateful for and the ways that God shows His ability to provide "dry ground" in my  life.  My email:

When my illness struck in 2011, I had no idea what a blessing the entire journey was going to be.  The first two days in the hospital I was unconscious and the guys in Jimmy's mens group did a conference call with him to pray over me.  Even though the doctors couldn't tell him if I was going to live, after that prayer, he had a peace beyond all understanding settle upon him. I am grateful for those prayers and for the fact that I did wake up.  The blessings continued to pour in. Visits (one friend even came to the hospital to paint my nails), meals (Jimmy's company brought meals to our family every single day for a month), prayers, a prayer shawl from our church family, friends who cleaned our house and did our laundry, friends who drove our kids to Chicago to stay with my parents during that first scary week, and a friend who came and spent a week helping Jimmy take care of the kids during one of my longer stays.  After the first few hospitalizations, work became difficult and so we went through about a year of financial hardship and even then, the blessings poured in.  One friend drove me to Ann Arbor for doctor's appointments.  She took days off work, wouldn't let me pay for gas and even bought lunch on those trips.  Another friend had four new tires put on our van.  Friends continued to bring meals or gift cards to grocery stores.  I remember one occasion when things were really tight and food was scarce.  A $300 Meijer gift card showed up in our mail anonymously.  God continued to put people in our lives who cared for us in every way that we needed. 

Even now, over three years into this journey, God continues to show up.  One of the side effects of my disease is that I don't produce enough saliva to keep the enamel on my teeth so they are ravaged and decayed.  With our seemingly insurmountable mountain of medical debt, dental work had to take a back seat.  But God came through again.  My family took exchange students when I was growing up and we recently reconnected with the second student we had hosted.  He came to visit in November and it turns out he is a dentist.  He has offered to do over $30,000 worth of dental work for free.  I will be heading to Germany for the work at the end of February.  And another friend is organizing a fundraiser to help with the medical debt. 

Every single time I think that we can't be blessed more, God has shown up and amazed me.  He continues to supply "good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over".

 

God has also blessed us with some pretty amazing kids.  It's so wonderful to see how much they are growing into their own personalities and how sweet, kind, generous and loving they are.  I still can't get over the fact that we have two high schoolers now and our baby isn't too far behind.

 

Even with the "thorn in my side" of Sjogren's, I still feel blessed beyond measure.  I always try to keep Paul's words in mind from 2 Corinthians:  Therefore, in order to keep me from becoming conceited, I was given a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me.  Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me.  But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me.  That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties.  For when I am weak, then I am strong.   2 Corinthians 12:7-10

 

Sometimes it's harder to remember those words, especially during a Sjogren's flare like I currently  have going.  As anyone with SJS will tell you, winter is hard on us dry people.  Our already dry eyes, noses, skin, lips, etc. get much more dry with a lack of humidity.  My mouth has been sore and dry, my lips scabbed and bleeding.  My poor right eyelid is red, swollen and scabbed at the eyelash line and my skin...well I've got lots of discoid dermatitis going on at the moment. My life consists of constant application of lip balm, a humidifier, prescription corticosteroid cream, warm compresses to my eye and LOTS of lotion and water.  

I really will make an effort to keep up with this.  But for now...it's nap time! 

 

Casting Anxieties

Humble yourselves, therefore, under God's mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time.  Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.  1 Peter 5:6-7

This verse should be my new motto.  I tend to be a worrywart....no actually, I am obsessive about worrying and planning if I am completely honest.  Since my illness began, I seem to have adopted a more relaxed, laid back attitude.  I'm not sure if that was more of a defense mechanism because I simply couldn't handle anything more, or if my illness showed me that all those worries were truly meaningless.  Either way, I've been cruising by without too much stress until recently.  Out of the blue, I'm swamped with worries.  Worrying about starting chemo, worrying about medical bills, about finances, about friends, about family members with illnesses, about teenagers, mothers, and things way beyond my control.  I wake up in the middle of the night every night (partially due to the steroids, but mainly, I think, due to the worries) and lie in bed with my mind racing.  In typical me mode, I try to make plans and determine the way that **I** can fix things.  Only I cannot fix anything.  My devotional keeps pounding me over the head with that knowledge, morning after morning.  

Yesterday it told me that God is the God of surprises and that He is not limited by the things I am limited by.

Jesus looked at them and said to them, "With men this is impossible, but with God, all things are possible."  Matthew 19:26

The day before that it told me "Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart" Psalm 37:4

And the day before that, I heard "Trust in him at all times, O people; pour out your hearts to him, for God is our refuge." Psalm 62:8

Am I sensing a theme here?  Our family puts a weekly verse on our chalkboard fridge for memorization and this week's verse is "Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light for my path" Psalm 119:105  I need to take this to heart.  His Word is here to comfort and to guide me.  I need to learn to rely on it and on Him, and to stop trying to rely on myself.

 

Goals for the New Year

Now, I don't normally do New Year's resolutions.  Mainly because I've learned over the years that I just don't keep to them.  But in light of the last year and how much it has changed our lives, my husband and I both decided to make some goals for 2013.  We have made up individual lists and a family list, both of which are still growing and evolving.  We both understand that all of the goals on our lists may not be attainable this coming year, but it is something to strive for.  There are plenty of other goals on the lists that will be easy to attain, so I am praying that we have the strength and will power to stick with them.

Here are a few items from my list:

Volunteer more
Add more healthy foods to my diet (how my picky self is going to do that, I don't know)
Read at least one nonfiction book a month
Be more disciplined in my daily quiet time with God

And a few examples from the family list:

Move towards being more self-sustaining by gardening-vegetables, herbs and fruit
Volunteering more as a family
Continue working on ending youth entitlement


I suppose that the gardening goal should be on my list as well since I will be the one mainly in charge of it.  In theory, gardening is awesome.  In practice, I stink at remembering to stay on top of watering, feeding and weeding. To solve most of the weeding issues, I'll be planting all of our stuff in containers.  I'll add watering as a daily chore for one of the kids as well to help out.

I'm excited about the new possibilities we have ahead of us in 2013 and I'm glad we'll be ringing it in with friends. 

The things kids say....and a day in the homemade life of a domestic diva

Yep, that's what my BFF (and yes, I still call her that..or bestie...how old am I?) has started calling me.  She is convinced that I have gone over to the domestic dark side.  Don't think she won't use this domesticity to her advantage though.  She has issued a challenge that I just had to accept to create baby chicks out of deviled eggs like so....

It is highly coincidental (nudge nudge) that my nephew's birthday party is this coming weekend and said nephew just happens to adore deviled eggs.  Yep uh huh....

Enough of that...I will post pictures (if it turns out!) once I create the baby chicks.

Life has been busy here in the Chase home.  We had our full family together this weekend which always involves lots of cooking and dishes as well as laughs and good times.  I took all the kids to see Finding Nemo in 3D.  We all love that movie and most of us can quote it by heart("I will call him Squishy and he shall be mine.  He shall be my Squishy.")  It was neat seeing it on the big screen but it definitely was not worth the 3D ticket prices for 3D.  After that, we all watched Snow White and the Huntsman which is one of my new faves.  

In my homemade adventures I made my own taco seasoning, baked some delicious and ridiculously easy crusty bread (recipe here), and made my husband some peppermint mocha coffee creamer (he is addicted to the York creamer).  This week is also our first attempt at doing our grocery shopping only once a month in order to be better stewards of God's money.  It feels like I spent all morning shopping and I still have two more stops to make tomorrow.  On the other hand, it'll be great to not to have to go to the store two or three times a week.  I will still need to get milk but only once a week or so.  We tend to go through about three gallons here a week and it would be impossible to store it for an entire month.  I will share tomorrow about all my finds and how close I stayed to my budget.  

And on a completely unrelated note.....Aidan & I had a conversation about college today.  On our way to his PT session, we saw a city bus dropping off several students at one of the downtown campuses for GVSU.  Aidan asked me if it would make me happy to have him go to a local college.  Of course!!!!!  He then proceeded to ask how far away GVSU was because he wanted to make sure it wasn't too far of a drive for me to drop him off at class everyday!  LOL  I find it absolutely adorable that my pre-teen boy thinks I will be driving him to class when he's in college.  

His grace is sufficient

Have you ever plotted your course, laid out your plans and pushed full steam ahead with whatever you wanted to do?  That is me to a T.  I am a planner by nature and a control freak by genes.  My husband used to joke that I knew our vacation schedule for the next ten years...and my friends frequently refer to me as the tour guide or social planner.  It's not just vacation and social plans that I make though.  I plan EVERYTHING.  If this gives you any idea, I am currently three gifts away from being done with our Christmas shopping.  

This may all sound grand and wonderful, but as a child of God, I should be leaving the plans up to Him.  "For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11 Why is it that I struggle so much in giving up control to God?  And then, when things don't go the way I planned or hoped, I flounder and stress and try to plan my way through the chaos.  Now I know, truthfully I do, that I need to hand the reins over to God and trust in Him.  My favorite verse talks about it and I even have it tattooed

"I will trust and not be afraid.  The Lord, the Lord, is my strength and my song.  He has become my salvation."

I was reading 40 days with Jesus yesterday and a few key quotes stood out to me:

"Sometimes My blessings come to you in mysterious ways:  through pain and trouble.  At such times you can know My goodness only through your trust in Me.  Understanding will fail you, but trust will keep you close to Me."

Or even this not so gentle nudge...

"I want you to embrace all that I am doing in your life, finding your security in Me alone."

Every time I feel that I am growing and maturing in my faith, something comes along to shake me to the core.  I know this is a lesson from God and I need to buckle down and learn it.  Trusting in God is so very difficult for me, but He is the only way I can make it through.

"My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." 2 Corinthians 12:9

I am so weak Lord, please forgive me and enfold me in your loving arms so that I may rely solely on your strength.


 

The Fifth Commandment

"Honor your father and mother, so that you may live in the land the Lord your God is giving you." Exodus 20:12

Our church just recently finished up a series on the Ten Commandments and our pastors did a fantastic job making each Commandment applicable to our lives today.  Going into this series, I knew the one I would struggle with the most was Commandment number five.  Please understand that I love my parents deeply but my mom & I have a rocky relationship.  

Right about the time that the sermon series on the Ten Commandments began, my mom & I had a falling out.  This in itself is not unusual...one can never tell what will set her off. The only difference is that the falling outs have gotten worse in the last few years.  My mother is ill. Mentally.  I am not being sarcastic when I say that.  She is bipolar as both her brother and father were.  This problem is compounded by the fact that she refuses to get medical help and that she uses her illness as an excuse to act worse than she really is.  She reads things into situations that aren't really there, hears words that aren't spoken and puts her own twist on nearly everything.  Our largest problem is that she has an unexplained loathing for my stepdaughters.  She imagines that I treat them better and love them more than my own two children and she resents them for that.  Mind you, she lives three hours away and has only seen us all together as a family maybe 8 times in the last 7+ years so how she has come to this conclusion I have no clue.  

We had a horrible falling out over the 4th of July last year where she said some horrible things about my youngest stepdaughter.  It was bad enough that my husband & I packed our kids up at 1am and  made the three hour drive home.  We did not speak for a month and then gradually started speaking but mostly it was her calling me to yell at me (not only at home, but she would call me at work as well).  She accused me of picking my stepdaughters over her but admitted that she was trying to force me to choose.  I explained that she would not like my choice.  The Bible tells us to cleave to our spouse and my stepdaughters are part of the deal.  I love them like they were my own kids.  Our relationship was strained for months and in December she told me that she had written me a long letter that I would not like because it told me what an ungrateful and bad daughter I was.  Shortly after that, I nearly died from meningitis and that seemed to completely change things.  Mom acted as if that strife had never happened and things went back to normal.

Of course...that never lasts.  She got angry recently because she tried to tell me what to do with my kids in a certain situation.  This is pretty commonplace for her.  She feels that she has the right to tell me what to do.  I don't mind her sharing her opinion on what to do, but she cannot tell me how to raise my own kids.  I told her that and it degenerated from there.  She was calling me names and telling me that I never loved her....and so on and so forth.  I did my best to keep my temper.  I continually try to act the way God would want me to but it is so very difficult in light of the things she says and does.  Shortly after this conversation ended, she called me back to tell me that my Dad had overheard and didn't agree with her so he left for work early.  She said that they were getting a divorce and it was all my fault so she hoped I was happy.  See....another reoccurring theme in our lives is how my mom is convinced that my dad & I always side against her and love each other more than we love her.  I've heard this from about age 10.  My Dad & I are very close, but the problem is that we are both pretty logical while she is very unreasonable.  This is why it appears that we are taking sides against her.

A week or two goes by and then she starts to act as if nothing had ever happened again.  Even though she said horrible things and then went two weeks without speaking to me, it was back to the status quo.  In the meantime, during the two week period, some big news came up that I shared with my Dad.  Since Mom wasn't speaking to me, I didn't talk to her about it.  I also assumed she would hear from a different source because she usually does.  By the time she started speaking to me again, it was old news and it didn't cross my mind to share it.  Yesterday in a phone conversation with my Dad, the subject was brought up and she realized that we both knew and didn't tell her.  Here we go again.....

Dad called to warn me but I didn't hear from her.  She ended up calling after 9 last night and I just wasn't ready to deal with it emotionally so I let it go to voicemail.  She of course left a harsh message about how she is excluded from this family and how furious she is.  After that, she called my daughter's cell phone repeatedly.  My kids are in bed by 8:30 on a school night and it bothers me that she was trying to bring my baby girl into this.  I need to call her today but man, I have no idea how to handle this situation.  God made it clear that we are to honor our parents but how do I honor her without allowing her to treat me poorly or run my life?  

"God states no qualifier.  He does not tell us to honor them only if they are honorable.  Simply because they are our parents, we must treat them with respect.......Granted, honoring parents can be difficult if Father is a drunk or Mother is a lying thief.  Their actions may sometimes be dishonorable, but because they are Dad and Mom, they are to be respected.  The Commandment has no loopholes."  From Bible Tools 

I'm sorry this vent is so very long but it has been on my heart and mind since her call yesterday.  If anyone out there does read this....please pray for wisdom and discernment for me so that I may say the right words and respond correctly.  Please pray for peace for my Mom.

Thanks! 

My so called Homemade Life......

In the past week or so, I've read a few different blog posts about how these two families do amazing things with their grocery budgets.  One family, with six members, only spends $200 a month on groceries!  HA!  I had to read her "how to" blog twice to make sure I read it right.  We have a family of four + two (one weekend a month, a week at Christmas, February, Spring break and two weeks a month in the summer) and we spend way more than that.  Try $350-$400 more a month.  Seriously.  Now I must admit, part of that is my own fault.  I make a budget but it's pretty......fluid...if you know what I mean.  

 That being said, hubby & I have talked and agreed to try to cut our grocery budget.  One of the things our Pastor talked about this morning at church was stewardship of the gifts God gives us.  I am a far cry from the horrible spender I was in my early 20's, but I'm far from where I should be in my stewardship.  It's time to change that and I know it can be done.  "I can do all things through Him who gives me strength." Philippians 4:13

Some of the tips I picked up in my recent blog surfing makes me want to slap my forehead in a big "DUH!" moment.  Things such as the "quick runs" to the store to pick up "one or two" items costs you far more than you planned.  So true.  One blogger literally only goes to the grocery store ONCE a month-amazing!  I actually went back and looked at what I spent solely at Meijer in August and it was over $800!  I went there at least 15 times in one month.  That also doesn't count my stops at Target or Aldi's. I technically have a meal plan that allows me to shop once every two weeks but I am going to try to stretch that.  

Another tip that is sooooo deceptively simple is grocery shopping with cash only.  I never really thought about it but I've always set a grocery budget but when I use my debit card, I don't mind going over because the money is in the account.  That most definitely adds up.  Some weeks I may budget $50 at Meijer but I spend $70 or $80.  I know most of the prices of our every day items so it shouldn't be hard to estimate how much cash to bring with.

A familiar theme in these brilliant budgeting blogs is....wait for it......homemade!  Theoretically I've always known that if you could make several of the items you stock in your pantry regularly, you would save money...but I never had the time or inclination to put it into practice.  Seriously though, if I buy hubby's favorite cinnamon roll oatmeal I will spend $3.00 for 10 small packets.  If I make it, I will spend $2.20 on a big container of quick oats and the rest of the items are already in my pantry.  Do you have any idea how many servings that will make?  I don't.....but I will!  I plan on making a premixed pancake/waffle mix, ranch dressing, taco seasoning, bread, hot dog & hamburger buns, oatmeal and a lot of treat items like fruit snacks (100% real fruit!) and muffins.  I'm even contemplating making my own laundry detergent and household cleaners.  

So over the next few weeks I plan on stocking up on pantry staples and making some basics.  I'm hoping to make my next grocery trip last me 3 weeks instead of 2 with no store stops in between.  I'll post my progress as it goes along.

On a completely unrelated note...I spent Saturday afternoon hitting craft stores with my baby girl.  She's as addicted to Michael's and Hobby Lobby as her mama. 

Here is what we made yesterday:

It's a Thankful Tree.  On the backs of the patterned paper, everyone can write down things that we are thankful for.  It's currently geared towards fall but this is not the only season to be thankful in so I think I will transition it to reflect each season as they come. 

Blowing their minds......

That's what my 12 year old boy tells me I've been doing to him and his little sister lately.  He was referring to the way I've been channeling Martha Stewart, Betty Crocker & Pinterest.  Not working has given me a LOT more time and it's allowed me to do many things that I've only contemplated in the past.  God has indeed blessed us.

So yesterday when Aidan walked in the door from school, he smelled one of his favorite scents....something sweet baking.  I swear, that kid has the nose of a hound dog.  I had found a cute idea on Pinterest and decided it would be simple and easy to make for dessert (and lunches!) last night.

My ingredients:  chocolate cupcakes & chocolate fudge frosting along with Oreos and M&M's

After you frost the cupcakes, open up the Oreo cookies carefully and place the frosted halves on the cupcakes like so:

Then you add the M&M's as the eyes and nose and voila! It's a cute big-eyed owl.

The kids loved them though they would be way too chocolate-y for me.